HUMP day...

OI! I am soooo tired.

Not physically tired really, at least not any worse than normal. I am tired in my brain, my center of being, that little dudette that makes me stay sane when all other about me are not…

Staying sane can be pretty difficult, ya know?

the theater goes apace. I began my next 13 nights (12 left) straight last evening, and it was totally boring for me to a large extent. Once things kind of got rolling on the second run through, it was better, but by then I just wanted to go home. I like what I am doing, though in the next show up, I do the lights…. should be interesting, but in a VERY dull way. Now that I have done the microphones on one show, I am fearful of the boredom that may set in…

**shrug** I am so easily bored these days, I scare myself.

Today I begin in earnest to find a new place to put my Budman. I am tired of the politics required to care for him where he is. The owner of the field is senile, the Land Lady (daughter of owner) tells me one thing, tells the other residents of the neighborhood other things, and the other residents (as far as I can tell) feel that they have first dibs on the good stuff, and they can make decisions without asking what is good for me and the horses that are in my care…

SO! **shrug** (again) Budman and I are moving on, the sooner, the better. I’ll give until the end of July… and that is it. By then I will know if I am keeping Bud or not. I most likely will ~ I hate giving up my baby.

though he IS terribly expensive to feed.

My girls are up to many things these days, t1k and SIL are talking about moving to WV. He has applied to a small company out there, and I (for one) am hoping that this works out for them. They need to be away from here ~ I shall miss them, but hey…if it will help them, it needs to happen.

t2k is “working” for a rafting company ~ I used to think that this company was fairly reputable…Not thinking that so much anymore. They are SOOOO using the kid, and it is beginning to piss me off. They are in a “win win” situation with her, free labor, lots of extra people coming in to ride “her” boats… the boats that she does NOT get to guide, even if she tries…

t3k is moping about. She went on the river yesterday with t2, and is exhausted still ~ she was sent home from work early on Sunday, then asked not to come in on Monday because the tourist business is so slow… poor thing. She was hoping to make enough money to buy a car this summer. So far she has made about $200.00.

All this leads up to one thing.

Yet again, I feel caught in the middle. I had figured out what I want to do, though nothing is ever cast in stone for me, it was a good thought, and a good way to go…now? I suffer from “not so sure” again. I’ve only the one kid that I have to worry about, but… still. Her sisters were allowed to do what they needed to make it through their teens, why shouldn’t she????

**sigh** I’ve reached, yet again, the ‘damned if I do, damned if I don’t” stage…

Dammit!

**Sigh**

Come on viggo, you are taking me to lunch.